Gairvani

Rajappa (Gairvani's father[Appa]) and Gairvani have just returned from Riverdale to Rajappa's ancestral home in Malgudi,(Rajappa's hometown).

Rajappa standing besides the ancient loft in his house.
Appa: "Gairvaaaani"! Can you please come here a minute and help me hold this stool?

Gairvaani: In a jiffy daddykins, just give me a moment.

Appa: Call me Appa(father) ok! And not daddykins!

Gairvani: Then you call me Vanessa and not Gairvaani, how about that?

Appa: Don't be ridiculous. Dont you know what your name means? "Gairvani" represents the "Sanskrit" Langugage which is one of the most ancient languages in the world and is supposed to be the language of the Gods.

Gairvani: Ya; But imagine what I had to put up in school. They shortened my name to Vani first, then "Vain" and they used to sing

Vain Vain Go away
Come again another day
Little Arthur wants to play
In the meadow by the hay!

I used to feel so ashamed to go to school. That's why I named myself Vanessa!

Appa: Silly excuses! Where was your sense of humor? You should have just laughed your way through this.By the way who is this Arthur?

(Giggly gairvani)
Gairvani: You really don't wanna know! He was big time courting me. I dated him a couple of times, but really not my type you know.

(Annoyed at his ignorance of such situations)
Appa: Hmph! Enough of unnecessary talk, let us get to business. Get into the loft and remember to wear your face mask.

Garivani: Yuck. Why is this loft so dirty?

Appa: Of course it will be dirty. It is so old. It used to be used for storing coconuts from the house. Every three months conconuts were plucked from the trees,counted and stacked here. It used to be infested with Rats.
We used to joke about it:

Let us make some coconut rice
Oh no! first we would have to kill the mice.
Let us make some sweets for the mouse-trap
Oh no! we would have to kills the ants, this is total crap.
Let us get some gammexane
Oh no!, This rhyme is turning me totally insane.

Gairvaani: Did you just make that up? It was pathetic!By the way Appa, what is in that big chest at the back there?

Appa: That contains my father's old typewriter. You know he was a famous writer. He used to take great care of the typewriter. I think it should still be in working condition.

Gairvani: Can you get that down for me. I am quite fascinated by old gadgets. I can use it for preparing my term paper based on our India visit.

Appa: Sure! Here hold it carefully. Let me find the manual for you that will help you set it up.

Gairvani: Daddy! Do you think that I am that dumb? I should be able to figure it out myself.

Appa: Your wish is my command my dear whiz Kid! It is all yours now!

Gairvani: Great! Leave me alone to do my work now.

Appa: Ok Ok ! Don't order me!

[Four hours later. Gairvani has been working on her report industriously.]
Appa: My darling daughter how is your report coming along! As my professor used to tell me you should do : constant consistent hard industrious meticulous work and not last minute work.

Gairvani: You always underestimate me don't you! I am done with this report finally. If you could just tell me how to print this out I shall do that and mail this report to the university.

Appa: WHAAAT! (Breaks out into loud laughter)Let me pass the manual to you at least now. It would probably take you 5 minutes to go through it.
*(and to himself chuckling : And another four hours typing your entire report again with paper in the tray).

[Inspired by an episode of "My Wife and Kids" on Star World)

Glossary
Riverdale = A fictional town in Archies *(set in the US)
Malgudi = A fictonal town in RK Narayan's novels (set in India)